Tofu Marinade
Holistic Recipe - Uropathic Tofu Marinade
Tuesday, Jun 02, 2015 by: Barry Hummus, Uropathist and Scatologist

Everybody loves tofu and everybody should by now know the health benefits of consuming urine, a practise known as uropathy or urine therapy. Not many people know however that uropathy and cooking can go hand in hand. From raw vegan uropathic milk shakes to high quality marinades, cooking with urine will extend your life and raise your vibrations. One of my favourite treats is tofu steeped overnight in a high quality holistic marinade. You will need a large jar and some tupperware.

Ingredients

  1. 10 cloves of garlic
  2. 1 liter of craft beer (American style IPA)
  3. 1 tablespoon of paprika
  4. 5 Amethyst crystals
  5. 1 hand full of fresh chopped chives.
  6. 500g of high quality gmo free, dolphin friendly white tofu.

The process

  • Squeeze any liquid from your tofu overnight by compressing it between two paper towels and placing a large weight on top. Encyclopaedia Britannica or a hard copy of Wikipedia should do.
  • Eat the garlic, you can swallow the cloves whole or crush them.
  • Wash down the garlic with the craft beer. Do not urinate yet. You should hold the beer in and go to bed so that it mixes with the garlic in your digestive system.
  • In the morning release your bladder into the large jar. You should have near 1 liter of fine garlic beer urine.
  • Dice your  tofu into bite size cubes and place into the tupperware with your amethyst crystals.
  • Drop your paprika and chives into the urine jar and give it a good shake. (Make sure you close the jar first)
  • Empty your jar into the tupperware making sure all the tofu is covered.
  • Leave in the fridge for 24 hours to let the natural fermentation process take place.
  • After 24 hours you can use the tofu for stir fry, kebabs (using dowsing sticks) or just eat it raw for the full benefits.
  • NOTE: Do not eat the amethysts. You can place them under your pillow though and they will raise your chakra vibrations.

Please be sure to comment if you enjoyed this recipe or have any additions you think would benefit other readers.

Happy Eating!