New Research Chemicals Approved by Soil Association
Thursday, May 21, 2015 by: Barry Hummus, Uropathist and Scatologist

In a ground breaking move, a new research chemical analogue of Ketamine a horse tranquilliser popular amongst students and drug addicts has been given the Soil Association seal of approval.

The drug, known on the street as Donkey Dust has recently become available to buy through online retailers who specialise in drugs that have not yet been made illicit. The effects are immediate and leave the user feeling euphoric for up to 1 hour. Excessive use however can cause the user to behave strangely and it has been known for Donkey Dust users to defecate on their own doorsteps while moaning about the poor quality of techno music today.

The soil association gave its approval due to the fact that Donkey Dust, being a research chemical is in fact a form of plant food. It is also produced using organic chemistry which means that it is indeed totally organic.

I do not condone the use of drugs but I do feel that this is a great step forward for the organic movement.